I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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