There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Good news: he out-ran the campus police. Bad news: they were chasing him toward the REAL police.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Randomize
