I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Welp...herpes.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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