I showed him my bush... on skype.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize