I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I have aggressive nipples.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
