i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize
