I just pynch a tree in the face
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
