Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize