He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
