Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
