I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
