He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
