I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
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