Small penises have feelings too.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
