My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
You came home And decided to make beer battered bacon... That's why there was smoke
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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