For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
