Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
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