life is too short to starve
life is also too short to be fat
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Randomize
