Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
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