me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
