yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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