you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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