dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
I cut my penus on the lid.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
