Its about making memories worth repressing
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Randomize
