Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
she looked like the before picture.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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