They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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