Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
