Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Randomize
