I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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