woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Randomize
