He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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