Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I just want to make out with him forever
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Randomize
