Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
