Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
what better to celebrate not being pregnant than to eat a bowl full of rum soaked pineapples?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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