Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
