it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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