Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Reggie can tackle my bush.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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