i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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