There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
