i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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