Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
so let's talk penis.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Randomize
