Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Randomize
