he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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