My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I think I sprained my soul last night
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
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