'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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