You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize