Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
