At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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