that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
This house was built for laser tag.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
