you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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