Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I'm both gender and math confused
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
