I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
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